About me – My personal story

 

Here is my personal story. I realize this has nothing to do with working from home, but I wanted you to know who you are dealing with on a personal level. 🙂  May it be a Blessing to you. If you don’t know the Lord you are taking a huge chance with your soul. This is really a very serious subject, so take a few minutes and read my story.

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I was born and raised in a small town (Herzogenaurach) Germany, near Nuernberg. It  dates back to the year 1000 where it had its Beginning. You will find the old  Main street still has cobblestones, a wall around the old part of town with ancient watchtowers. The buildings are mostly stone with inlaid wood and are very pretty. It’s a quaint little town. Herzo, as our American friends call it is also home of Adidas and Puma and for many years had an American base there.

I was an only child. My father was a pilot and my mother worked at the American base as an interpreter when needed as she spoke fluent English. She also taught German to American soldiers.  But for the most part she was a housewife and mother. I won’t go into details here because it was really sad, but my parents didn’t get along very well, my father’s life was all about flying and my mother didn’t care for it. Growing up I listened to many arguments and often even fights. My father was never really fond of me and I couldn’t figure it out until after my mom died why that was.

I went to school in a nearby town called Erlangen. We took a train to school as we didn’t have school buses like here in the States. One particular day when I came home from school (I was 15 at the time) I got a horrible shock! I found my mom on the floor of our living room, still alive, but in horrible pain and I knew she would never make it. She had been very depressed and my parents talked of divorce, so at age 37 she decided to end her own life – it was very tragic. Because a young person might read this, I won’t go into detail here – suffice it to say, I was in shock! She had chosen a most terrible way to end her life. I blamed my father for her death and for the next 18 years I refused to speak to him again. It was after the funeral that he told me that he was not my biological father and told me the story of how I came to be. But that’s a different story again. He later  married the women he had known for a while and had two more daughters.

A couple of years went by and  I really wanted to get far away from my hometown and start over someplace new. I had met an American soldier about 8 years older than me at the time. He used to take German lessons from my mother. We fell in love and I got married very young at 17. My son Jim was born the same year, I was nearly 18 years old. He is the one good thing that came out of this marriage! The rest is too painful and sad to recall. Let’s just say I didn’t like being used as a punching bag and didn’t feel the need to compete with other women. I did not want a repeat of my parent’s life.  Sad to say at one point I tried to take my own life as it seemed so pointless and lonely. I thank God that I failed at that attempt and that the Lord had mercy and spared my life.  At age 20 I found myself alone in this country with my little boy and I thank God for him, he kept me from going that way again knowing that I  had a responsibility to raise Jim. Being a trusting person and still naïve I tended to trust people and believe what they said. This ended up being my downfall more than once. I could tell you about the next 16 years, but I’ll skip ahead a few years here.

I had stumbled through life trying to figure out what it was all about. My dream as a young women was simply to love and be loved, have a family and live happily ever after…..wow, did I ever miss the boat! I did have the desire to have my own business, so I could be more independent, take care of my son and be able to be at home at the same time. Well, I did accomplish that goal by the time I was 30 and I worked hard with my hands to build my Stained Glass Studio which grew into being one of the largest in New Hampshire at that time. I also had a lovely old Victorian home, drove a nice car,  and was able to go on great vacations. So according to world’s standards my life should have been a bowl of cherries, so why did it seem like I was living in a pit?

By the time I was 36 years old, I had been married  for the third time and that marriage had fallen apart as well. You have probably heard about Murphy’s law, maybe even met this Mr. Murphy yourself at times. Anyway, on Jan. 3rd,1982, being all myself at home, my house caught on fire and by the time I woke up it had smoldered for several hours already and the smoke was thick and black. I was trapped in my bedroom as the way downstairs was blocked by smoke. It was amazing how I could see the smoke, hear the fire, and yet there was no smoke in my room nor any damage. Two men driving by saw what was happening, they saw me sitting on the window ledge yelling for help, and got a ladder to help me out of the house. Amazingly enough I did not panic, had no desire to take anything with me, I just simply wanted to get out alive, and thanks to these men, I did! When I stood in the driveway looking at the house, now smoke coming out of windows and flames through the roof, I just thanked God that I was alive. The firemen did an excellent job putting the fire out, and the house having been well-built withstood the worst of it and was still standing, but the inside was very damaged. The contractor that had rebuilt my house told me how odd it was that there was no damage in my room, as my son’s room next door was not even there anymore and the beams under my rooms were burnt and above the attic was a mess. He felt like it had been preserved! Even the firemen  felt I should have died of smoke inhalation.  I thought at the time that I was lucky – but I did not realize  that God had spared my life once again. This was the third time! Years before I had gotten into a serious head-on collision and spent a month in the hospital with a cast on my face, and amazingly enough there was a Plastic Surgeon at the hospital checking on his patient and he patched my face back together.

1982 turned out to be one of the worst years of my life, not just the fire, but so many other personal sad things happened that I got pretty depressed. I tried to cover it up by being “superwoman” and worked until I dropped into bed at night often just crying myself to  sleep for a few hours. I thought something was wrong with me, after all, I did have friends that had happy marriages, or at least they seemed that way to me, and that’ s what I wanted too.  At the end of that year a man came to my shop and  told me about a man called Jesus and this now is our Story!:)

At first, I wanted nothing to do with what I thought was religion. After all, when my mother died, the church refused to give her a burial, because she committed the “immortal” sin. No one ever came from the church to comfort a torn up 15-year-old girl! I left the church, but still believed in God, I just didn’t know Him, because we were not shown the way of salvation from the Bible. But I wanted nothing more to do with religion. When my son was born, then the priest came to visit me and told me I had to baptize him, so he would not go to hell. I told him I did not think it worked that way and I refused to have him baptized and told the priest that I would do my best to teach my son about God and when he is old enough he could choose his own religion, and then I asked him to leave. When he tried to make the sign of the cross over Jim’s crib, I blocked his arm.  I was the black sheep in that little town!

So, I read the booklets  this man gave me, which are written in comic book form, and one in particular got my attention. It is called  “the King of Kings.” ( you’ll find them here) www.chick.com

That book was a condensed  version of the Bible in pictures and had many Bible verses explaining the fall of man and finally how the Lord Jesus Christ came into this world because He loves us and after a short time on this earth He gave Himself and let Himself be crucified, shed His precious blood, and took all our sins on Him on that cross, so we would be saved and go to heaven with Him when we die.

I read this booklet over more than once and one Sunday morning in January of 1983, in my bedroom,  (one year after the fire)  I understood for the first time that I was lost and needed to be saved. I got on my knees and the best way I knew how I acknowledged to God that I was a sinner (I had no doubts about that!) and then I asked Him to forgive me of my sins and to come into my heart and life and to save my soul. I had no idea at the time that the Bible calls this “being born again” I just knew that something had happened!  I had a desire to pray and read the Bible and go to church – a desire that I did not have before that day! I left church 18 years before, did not have a Bible and the only prayer I knew was “Our Father” and that only partly. I had no idea what church to go to and how to pray. I just started talking to the Lord and He heard me and answered my prayers. He led me to a small Bible believing Baptist church in Portsmouth, NH where the Pastor gave me my first Bible, a King James Bible and encouraged me to read it and to come to church. Praise the Lord – that was 27 years ago. The first time I opened that Bible it “happened to open” to  I John and as I was reading along, this verse stood out to me because it said  “…the darkness is past and the true light now shineth”  and I realized then the Bible was more than a book, it was/is the Word of God, because it became very personal to me. As I grew as a Christian, I came across a story in the Bible about a woman at a well who had been married 5 times and lived with a man who was not her husband. Yet, Jesus had mercy on this woman and saved her soul. I was so glad this story was in the Bible and the Lord forgave this “woman at the well”

I did contact my father in Germany after 18 years and asked him to forgive me for not being in touch with him all those years.  I understood at that time that it was not my father’s fault, my mother had other choices. We had a long conversation and I also wrote him a very long letter telling him what had happened to me. He said he was glad that I called and said that sometimes people die unexpectedly and then we are left with guilt feelings. We made a date to meet in Dallas where he would fly into, but unfortunately I never saw him again as he died of a massive heart attack at age 62. I remembered his words though and was very thankful that I called him and he forgave me.  The Lord also helped me to forgive my mother and others in my life that had hurt me pretty bad. I had held a lot of bitterness in my heart and forgiveness heals that bitterness and puts a new love for people in its place – it worked that way for me anyway. I had asked the Lord to take that bitterness out of my heart and replace it with His love and to  let me see people through His eyes.

I will never forget the reaction of my friends! One, Janette, came into my shop one day, saw me reading my Bible and she also saw the big genuine smile on my face, radiating the peace that God had given me and said this:” Heidi, what happened to you? Let me touch you and maybe some of this will rub of on me” I promise, these were her exact words. I told her it didn’t work that way, but she could have what I have found herself and I proceeded to tell her what had happened to me and I told everyone that came to my shop, every day and I was a changed woman. For the first time in my life I was truly happy and I truly was loved!!! To tell you of the Blessings the Lord gave me is on another page here.

I encourage you to search your heart and ask yourself: ”Am I saved, born again, or do I just have a religion?” People say things like “All roads lead to Rome” and that maybe true, but there is only one way that leads to heaven and that is through Jesus Christ and the finished work on the cross. There is no other way. Jesus himself said this: “..I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.”

If a drug addict wants to quit drugs, he has to admit first that he has a problem before he can get help. The same with a drunkard,  or any other vice.

The same holds true in the spiritual realm. First, you have to admit that you are a sinner, then acknowledge the fact that there is a price to be paid for your sins. The good news here is that someone very special paid that price – you have heard of Him, I’m sure – the Lord, Jesus Christ paid in full on the cross for all of your sins. Then be willing to repent of your sins (you went your way, now turn around and go God’s way) and ask the Lord to forgive you of your sins and to save your soul. There is no sample prayer here, it is a heart matter. If you are truly sorry for what you did (not just that you got caught!) then there is hope for you. The Lord will hear your prayer and you will know that you are saved!

  • “For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God” Rom 3:23
  •  “ As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one;”Rom3:10
  •  “Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:” Rom 5:12
  • “For the wages of sin is death: but the gift of God is eternal l life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” Rom 6:23
  • “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.” Eph 2:8-9
  • “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son,  that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” John 3:16
  • “The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.” II  :9
  • “That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.” Rom 10:9-10

 

There is so much more I could say here, but I will let others say it instead. Millions of people have been saved over the centuries, from all kinds of walks of life, but we all came the same way: We admitted our sinful condition, realized that there is a price to be paid for our sins and that the Lord Jesus Christ had already paid that prize on the cross where he shed His precious blood. All that’s left for us to “do” is to ask Him for forgiveness of sins, be willing to turn from them and ask Him to save us.

It’s too simple you may say? I have one question for you then: If we can do anything to earn our way into heaven, then why did Jesus Christ die for us? Please consider the question carefully. The choice you make regarding your eternal soul is a very serious matter.

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My son Jim who was in the Navy at the time of the fire got saved a little over one year later!

The contractor that rebuilt my house got saved 7 years later:) 2 days later his girlfriend got saved and they got married!

My good friend who actually was living in my house, but was gone for the weekend,  got saved 16 years later!

Praise the Lord!!!!:)